Onionized #1

• According to a recent study, people who engage in casual sex find it rewarding only for the first few decades of the no-strings-attached passionate orgasms.

• Gotta love the Brady Quinn hype: "Establishing a reputation for quarterback performance that football insiders have called 'reasonable,' Browns quarterback Brady Quinn silenced his critics and stunned his coaches, teammates, and family by performing competently enough in his limited play during preseason games to put the Cleveland Browns in 2007 post-preseason contention." [Article]

• Op-Ed: "Bro, You're A God Among Bros"

• School shootings help: "A U.S. Department of Education report released Monday reveals that school shootings leave students significantly better prepared for the random gunfire and everyday killing sprees that await them in the larger world."

• Pitchfork Gives Music a 6.8: "Coming in at an exhausting 7,000 years long, music is weighed down by a few too many mid- tempo tunes, most notably 'Liebesträume No. 3 in A flat' by Franz Liszt and 'Closing Time' by '90s alt-rock group Semisonic," Schreiber wrote. "In the end, though music can be brilliant at times, the whole medium comes off as derivative of Pavement."